Read How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age by Dale Carnegie Free Online
Book Title: How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age|
The author of the book: Dale Carnegie
Format files: PDF
The size of the: 3.77 MB
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Reader ratings: 5.4
Edition: Simon & Schuster Ltd
Date of issue: August 31st 2011
ISBN 13: 9780857207289
Read full description of the books:
Simple advice: Listen. Remember people's names. Smile. And yet, I forget.
My only criticism: I would have liked more examples that related to the digital realm. If I'd read the original "How to Win Friends", I may not have found enough new information to be satisfied.
You can make more friends in two months by becoming more interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get people interested in you.
The two highest levels of influence are achieved when (1) people follow you because of what you've done for them and (2) people follow you because of who you are.
Fae-to-face was the expectation. Today it is the exception.
It thus seems to be the case, online as well as offline, that when you smile, the world smiles with you.
Outside of emoticons...there is only one medium in which you can convey a digital smile - your voice, whether it is written or spoken. How you write an email, the tone you use, and the words you choose are critical tools of friendliness and subsequent influence.
Always begin an end the message on a positive note rather than a pessimistic or detached one. [i.e. compliment sandwich]
[T]he size of our brains limits our ability to manage social circles to around 150 friends, regardless of our sociability.
So much of our time online is spent arguing or feeding arguments...Few of these arguments change people's minds. Because the arguments are digitally veiled and lack the clear-cut consequences of tangible confrontations, both parties can get away with devolving into snarky personal attacks and passive ambiguity - the least effective tools of human relations.
All effective problem solving...begins with an emptying of the mind - of what we know or what we think we should know.
Admit that you may be wrong. Concede that the other person may be right. Be agreeable. Ask questions. And above all, consider the situation from the other's perspective and show that person respect.
When we recognize and admit our errors, the response from others is typically forgiveness and generosity.
We are more inclined to agree with another person or see things from his perspective when we have friendly feelings toward him.
If you believe building a friendly rapport will be critical to achieving a certain outcome, using texts, chats, or other short forms of communication isn't likely to get you very far.
Either you can seek success for those who are already friends or you can seek success for those who are already friends.
When your journey is our journey, we are both compelled to see where it goes.
[Three-for-one rule: You must write down three positive things about a person before you can attempt to address any behavior that you perceive as negative.]
When we talk about our mistakes, it makes us human. It becomes easier for people to relate to us...By admitting your own mistakes, you direct the other person's attention away from his own; you soften the approach and avoid raising his defenses immediately.
The leader understands that mistakes and failures surface from all corners of life and, therefore, should be treated as isolated and redeemable instances rather than fatal flaws.
It is to your advantage to pull people out of their dejected state as quickly as possibly. Do so by calling out their mistakes quietly and returning them to a place of confidence and strength.
Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
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Read information about the authorDale Breckenridge Carnegie (originally Carnagey until 1922 and possibly somewhat later) (November 24, 1888 – November 1, 1955) was an American writer and lecturer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking and interpersonal skills. Born in poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People, first published in 1936, a massive bestseller that remains popular today. He also wrote a biography of Abraham Lincoln, titled Lincoln the Unknown, as well as several other books.
Carnegie was an early proponent of what is now called responsibility assumption, although this only appears minutely in his written work. One of the core ideas in his books is that it is possible to change other people's behavior by changing one's reaction to them.
Born in 1888 in Maryville, Missouri, Carnegie was a poor farmer's boy, the second son of James William Carnagey and wife Amanda Elizabeth Harbison (b. Missouri, February 1858 – living 1910). In his teens, though still having to get up at 4 a.m. every day to milk his parents' cows, he managed to get educated at the State Teacher's College in Warrensburg. His first job after college was selling correspondence courses to ranchers; then he moved on to selling bacon, soap and lard for Armour & Company. He was successful to the point of making his sales territory of South Omaha, Nebraska the national leader for the firm.
After saving $500, Carnegie quit sales in 1911 in order to pursue a lifelong dream of becoming a Chautauqua lecturer. He ended up instead attending the American Academy of Dramatic Arts in New York, but found little success as an actor, though it is written that he played the role of Dr. Hartley in a road show of Polly of the Circus. When the production ended, he returned to New York, unemployed, nearly broke, and living at the YMCA on 125th Street. It was there that he got the idea to teach public speaking, and he persuaded the "Y" manager to allow him to instruct a class in return for 80% of the net proceeds. In his first session, he had run out of material; improvising, he suggested that students speak about "something that made them angry", and discovered that the technique made speakers unafraid to address a public audience. From this 1912 debut, the Dale Carnegie Course evolved. Carnegie had tapped into the average American's desire to have more self-confidence, and by 1914, he was earning $500 - the equivalent of nearly $10,000 now - every week.
Perhaps one of Carnegie’s most successful marketing moves was to change the spelling of his last name from “Carnegey” to Carnegie, at a time when Andrew Carnegie (unrelated) was a widely revered and recognized name. By 1916, Dale was able to rent Carnegie Hall itself for a lecture to a packed house. Carnegie's first collection of his writings was Public Speaking: a Practical Course for Business Men (1926), later entitled Public Speaking and Influencing Men in Business (1932). His crowning achievement, however, was when Simon & Schuster published How to Win Friends and Influence People. The book was a bestseller from its debut in 1937, in its 17th printing within a few months. By the time of Carnegie's death, the book had sold five million copies in 31 languages, and there had been 450,000 graduates of his Dale Carnegie Institute. It has been stated in the book that he had critiqued over 150,000 speeches in his participation of the adult education movement of the time. During World War I he served in the U.S. Army.
His first marriage ended in divorce in 1931. On November 5, 1944, in Tulsa, Oklahoma, he married Dorothy Price Vanderpool, who also had been divorced. Vanderpool had two daughters; Rosemary, from her first marriage, and Donna Dale from their marriage together.
Carnegie died at Forest Hills, New York, and was buried in the Belton, Cass County, Missouri cemetery. The official biography fro