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Ebook Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy by Jack Handey read! Book Title: Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy
The author of the book: Jack Handey
Format files: PDF
The size of the: 39.89 MB
City - Country: No data
Loaded: 1224 times
Reader ratings: 5.2
Edition: Hachette Books
Date of issue: 1993
ISBN: 1562828401
ISBN 13: 9781562828400
Language: English

Read full description of the books:



Same review for this as the previous collection:

Before Mitch Hedberg, demotivational posters, status updates, 140-character tweets, or numerous internet jokes devoted to "shower thoughts," there was Jack Handey's Deep Thoughts. Usually one-liners, these non sequiturs--always paired with serene images--range from absurd musings to historic revisions to unusual logic to bait-and-switch humor to the anti-comic. The best ones are a little twisted.

Packing a bunch of them together takes some of the punch out of it, as does reading it today when so much has happened in the evolution of comedy since the years Deep Thoughts was on SNL. But Jack Handey's creativity still resonates in enough pages to make this quick read worth a meditative flip-through, even though nowadays the gems would be little more than a comic tweet quickly drowned by the oversaturated sea of electronic information.


(view spoiler)[
My favorites:
“I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver. And since he’s busy, you’d probably have to run up to him real quick and hand it to him.”

“Instead of trying to build newer and bigger weapons of destruction, mankind should be thinking about getting more use out of the weapons we already have.”

“Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I spin around and pin the guy’s arm behind his back. Now who’s asking the questions?

“Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess was why several of us died from tuberculosis.”

“If you’re robbing a bank, and your pants fall down, I think it’s okay to laugh, and to let the hostages laugh too, because come on, life is funny.”

“Sometimes I think I’d better off dead. No, wait. Not me, you.”

“When people say that the desert is lifeless, it just makes me want to grab them by the collar and yell, “Why you stupid, stupid bastard!” Then I drive them out into the desert to where the circus is, and point out the many forms of zebra and clown life.”

“When you’re going up the stairs and you take a step, kick the other leg up high behind you to keep people from following too close.”

“As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was it nothing more than a bunch of honking and yelling? Sometimes it seemed that way.”

“I wish outer-space guys would conquer Earth and make people their pets, because I’d like to have one of those little basket-beds with my name on it.”

“It’s true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets his wings. But what they don’t tell you is, every time you hear a mousetrap snap, an angel gets set on fire.”

“I remember how, in college, I got that part-time job as a circus clown, and how children would laugh at me. I vowed, then and there, that I would get my revenge.”

“I hope that they never find out that lightning has a lot of vitamins in it, because do you hide from it or not?”

“I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out that I’d just quit my job and become a bum for a few years, because I was thinking about doing that anyway.”

(hide spoiler)]


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Read information about the author

Ebook Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy read Online! Jack Handey is an American humorist. He is best known for his Deep Thoughts, a large body of surrealistic one-liner jokes, as well as his "Fuzzy Memories" and "My Big Thick Novel" shorts. Many people have the false impression that Jack Handey is not an actual person, but a character created by Saturday Night Live or a pen name used by National Lampoon.


Reviews of the Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy


ARTHUR

Why do you ask me to drive a phone?

JOSHUA

Book will go one time.

MARTHA

Very controversial Vpechalenija

DAVID

Why do I need to specify a phone number?

CHLOE

Why do you need to specify a phone?




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